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Whispers of Yellow

September 22, 2007


“The heart breaks and breaks and lives by breaking. It is necessary to go through dark and deeper dark and not to turn.” –from “The Testing-Tree,” by Stanley Kunitz

Inspired this night, may my words bring comfort to those who have experienced great loss such as I have; better yet, may the Comforter whisper to you.

// Driving ‘neath September’s moon
Passing city lights and then suddenly slowing
Almost to a stop
Inching along, stillness exudes
Days of nonstop movement, now halted
Months worth of emotion hardened around my heart
Stop…Go…Stop…Go

Sirens, lights ahead pleading, no, forcing me to stop
Fifteen minutes to travel one mile
My plans interrupted

Warm honey trickled over me, seeping into the stone
Melted like butter, romanced by a lover
My Comforter came to me
Tears welled up in my eyes, too big to hold
Soon a flood gate opened
Streams of living water ran down, down
My body went limp, my heart malleable

Weeping Willow

Ten years since her death and today…
Today, ten years since her burial
Yellow roses, her favorite
Songs of sorrow echo

A new place in life, transition—O what I’d do to have her comfort for one more day, one more minute
She sings to me in my sleep at times
I can still hear her voice
Tender
Compassionate
Rings in my ears like church bells
Soothes like a songbird
Her sweet smell
Soft touch

Comforter, come to me
And O how He does

The pain wraps around me like a vine
Darkens, keeping me from the sun

Deep rooted, I am—I LIVE
He trims away the vines
Just another face in a sea of faces
He comes to me
Sitting in the car, He meets with me
He knows me
And I know Him

Beyond my plans, He weaves
Finding the time for me
He cares enough to interrupt my plans

He knows my every scar
Every tear

“Come to me, my child”
Just as she did,
He holds me
And sings to me:

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
“You make me happy, when skies are gray
“You’ll never know dear, how much I love you
“O please don’t take my sunshine away”

I pass the sirens and flashing lights
Traffic picks up speed
Life continues
His peace remains
My heart renewed

He found time for me

Rays of sunshine
No vines
Yellow roses begin to grow //

“Beauty is God’s handwriting.” –Charles Kingsley

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