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April 9, 2016

All my life I’ve been the kind of person to always ask, “Why?” Perhaps it’s my melancholy temperament or my INFJ personality type. My dad used to get so annoyed because I would always respond to his answer with, “Why?” (Yes, I was that kid.) I always wanted to know why things happened, why we had certain rules, why we did things a certain way, why something worked the way it did…why?…Why?…Why?…

Over the last year, the Lord has been teaching me a lot about asking, “Why?”

I was talking to a friend last Fall and she pointed out,

“Have you ever noticed that God never answered “Why?” in the Bible? Have you noticed that He never answers that question?”

She reminded me that when God responded to Job He basically said, “And where were you when I created the heavens and the earth?” She proceeded to ask,

“Why are we so quick to accept the good but not the bad?”

I felt very challenged by this.

I thought about it for a while and had to agree with her, that yes, I have never had God answer my “Whys???” (and I have a ton of them!) Usually He answers me with another question. He tells me that He loves me. He tells me that He’s for me. He tells me that He’s with me in the midst of it all.

She continued in the conversation,

“But He never, never, never answers, “Why did ___ have to die?”  “Why are children raped?”  Well, evil.  But why evil in the first place?  “Because I am God.  Period.  Thanks for asking.”In all this, I’d still rather have God on my side than anyone or anything else.  Because a confusing God who says “no” more than I think He should is still the best lover and parent source of good there ever is.

Tonight when I was praying, I started to ask, “Why?” I stopped myself and then I prayed,

“Lord, at the end of all my whys, let me find you and let your presence be enough to satiate my hunger to know why.”

There are many things that happen in our lives…things we may never know the reason for: sickness, death, tragedy, etc. Whether it’s the pure result of our sinful nature and a fallen world or if there is greater purpose (usually there is….sanctification…God’s glory being made known…etc.), we may never know the exact reason why someone had to die or why you had to go through something. That’s the hard part. Not knowing exactly why.

In the end, having the ability to ask God, “Why?” and then be satisfied with only finding Him at the end of my questions is walking by faith. It is the kind of faith that is causing my roots to go deeper to find water. It’s the kind of faith that causes me to trust deeper. To have greater courage. To hold on tighter. And to experience His love with greater measure.

So, whatever your WHY is tied to…I pray that you will find Him on the other side of your WHY and be filled with HIS peace, love, joy, and hope. I pray that you would find complete satisfaction in knowing that He’s always there on the other side. 

“Beautiful truth out of unbeautiful reality. The whys are never ending, but this truth puts them in their place– this is gold. ” – Tammi Wenzig

“We can ignore even pleasure. But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” -C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

“The real problem is not why some pious, humble, believing people suffer, but why some do not.”-C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

“We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn,’ and I accept it. I’ve got nothing that I hadn’t bargained for. Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not imagination.” – C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

“God has not been trying an experiment on my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn’t. In this trial He makes us occupy the dock, the witness box, and the bench all at once. He always knew that my temple was a house of cards. His only way of making me realize the fact was to knock it down.”
– C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

“You never know how much you really believe anything until its truth of falsehood becomes a matter of life and death to you. It is easy to say you believe a rope to be strong and sound as long as you are merely using it to cord a box. But suppose you had to hang by that rope over a precipice. Wouldn’t you then first discover how much you really trusted it?”- C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

“Can a mortal ask questions which God finds unanswerable? Quite easily, I should think. All nonsense questions are unanswerable. How many hours are in a mile? Is yellow square or round? Probably half the questions we ask – half our great theological and metaphysical problems – are like that.”- C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

“Perhaps your own reiterated cries deafen you to the voice you hoped to hear”- C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

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